Of Opportunities and Chances

◊ Career ◊

First things first: some good news. I got some invite via text message from my favorite hospital rotation during internship if I would be interested in applying for the staff job. Waaah!

Just yesterday, we went around that hospital area were we happened to passed by our former clinical supervisor and now colleague and was wondering why we were there. We are actually there to apply for the alumni ID on the 8th floor, but I jokingly said “Were here to apply at your department sir!”, knowing there isn’t really an opening. Then he somehow shared some “secret” for now info, that actually they are opening up the department for applicants. But there’s a catch, it’s invitational. He then ask if we were in the top 10. My friend whose with me is a topnotcher. At that point, I was disappointed. I thought I could finally get a working experience on one, if not the premiere hospitals in the country, but then knowing they are to invite top notchers, I immediately snapped out of it. Again here comes inferiority complex, regrets and “not-good-enough” feelings and “if only’s”. I even joked on my friend, knowing she’s not interested in the oppotunity, if I can borrow her title just for this job. What’s with all the fuzz? It is the honor it brings to be a part of this hospital. A great background work experience, where country’s bests take part, and I think the highest salary in our profession in the country is received by staffs here. But then I can’t be, just because I’m not good enough to be a top notcher.

Then by some twist of fate, today I received the message. They want to hear from me. Great! Superb! Knowing yesterday that it is by invitation makes it even better.

Coming from the testimonial ceremonies today, our group made way to some relaxing and went to videoke. We happened to pass by some former staffs and formally announced the opening. Now its not invitational anymore? Hehe.

It’s just that “by invitation” makes me feel more special, some confidence booster that I may be worth something and some great people in the profession happen to appreciate it. But invitational or not, I’ll be trying out for it. It, after all, is, my dream experience. Actually now, whether I make it as a staff or not, just the feel of being able to be affiliated with the hospital is honor enough. But I do hope I make it. Hehe. So much for thinking why I’m being of a bum nowadays than immediately plunging into work. Maybe this is just what I am waiting for. And God has brought it to me. Amazing opportunity. God knows best! Weeeeeeh.

=^=^=^=^=^=^=

♥ Love ♥

Yesterday, I was so excited to finally see everybody again in the testimonial ceremonies. Then he texted. He texted just when me and cathycardia were talking about my moments with him. Maybe I should talk about him more often with other people so he always text and remember me. Anyway, time to text back, some flirting opportunity, and my lack of the skill again surfaces and I blew the chance. He said he isn’t gonna make for today’s testimonials. Instead of cathycardia’s coach to reply “I was really hoping that you’re gonna be there” kind of thing, I opted to reply a more general and safe remark, “I thought tomorrow was going to be a reunion for all of us. But then you’re not going and so as many other people.” Wahh. Blowing the chance again. I was this close to telling him I missed him dearly from the bottom of my heart, when he texted that he was looking forward for a movie marathon and ice cream (as friends of course, silly you!) I chose to text, “I missed our escapades and get-aways, I wish we could do that again sometime”. Hay, when will I learn?

Again, just when I thought I am now a cold blooded person, with no spark of feelings for anybody, some fire started burning again. Some.

And I was planning not to attend the testimonial event for the board passers because he isn’t going to be there, but I did anyway. For my alma mater who is very proud of me.

After the ceremonies, our former professor, now colleague, gave our ‘curly’ friend (who is a known follower and has some degree of affection for him) his trophy to keep it for him because he didn’t made it today. Okay here comes opportunity by my side today again, when our ‘curly’ friend decided to give his trophy to me… Okay… For safekeeping because 1) it won’t fit her bag and I have a humongous bag and 2) because daw he is more likely to see me than her (on the friendly note ha, kasi nga were berks, me and him). So now, yes the trophy is on the top of my cabinet. For everyone to see. So much view for someone who is trying to get-over her affections for him but is in everyday torture of being reminded of him everytime she goes inside her room. Wahhh. Ano ba ito? Opportunity nga ba? Ang kulit namang opportunity nyan.

Make sense of this things for me please. Haha.